


Told You So

by FlagofHeaven



Category: Captain America (Movies)
Genre: Established Bucky/Steve, Established Relationship, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Post-Captain America: Civil War (Movie)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-11
Updated: 2016-09-11
Packaged: 2018-08-14 12:01:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,887
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8012998
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FlagofHeaven/pseuds/FlagofHeaven
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bucky has been out of cryofreeze and deprogrammed the triggers Hydra put in his head. </p><p>Steve is convinced he's safe. Bucky isn't so sure.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Sparring

One month after Bucky had come out of cryofreeze, Steve screwed up. Monumentally. 

After weeks of therapy and physical tests the doctors in the Wakanda medical facility were convinced they had successfully neutralized the trigger words in Bucky’s head. It wasn't as physically painful as having the triggers built into his mind, but it wasn't a walk in the park to relive all the terrible things Hydra had made him do. Bucky would be glad to never think about that stuff again....and the fact he still dreamt about it almost every night didn't help. Steve was there, each time he woke up or panicked in the middle of the night, holding him tightly and comforting him.

Ever since he had come out of cryo Steve had been by his side playing the role of supportive boyfriend, which in this relationship occasionally meant serving as a sparring partner in Bucky's physical recovery and reconditioning. The techs were still developing a new arm for Bucky, so when he had joked that Steve had the upper hand Steve jokingly held his left arm behind his back.

"If I'm gonna beat you, it better be a fair fight," Steve said.

Bucky shook his head and laughed. "Use both hands and I'll still kick your ass, old man," Bucky shot back.

They danced around each other, landing a few preliminary hits.

"We should get out of here," Steve said, blocking Bucky's punch.

"It's a pretty beautiful city out there," Bucky said. "Date night?" He kicked his right foot forward, connecting hard with Steve's ribs.

"No, I mean out of here. Wakanda. Get back into the real world." Steve swiped his own foot out, tripping Bucky and landing him on the ground. The solider rolled away, springing back up.

"Right, Captain America and the Winter Soldier, bet it'll be really easy for us to walk around Times Square."

Steve grinned. "Ok, that might be too public. But you know what I mean. We can't hide here forever."

"It's safe here," Bucky replied, lunging at Steve again. "Have you seen those Wakandan guards? Even I'd have trouble breaking past them."

"You're not a prisoner here," Steve said.

Bucky shrugged, blocking Steve's kick and propelling him sideways. "I can't hurt anyone here."

"That's what you're worried about? Bucky, you're not dangerous anymore. Think about it, we could go wherever, do whatever."

"Save the world?"

Steve smiled. "Obviously."

"You're still that kid from Brooklyn who couldn't pass up a chance to do the right thing." Bucky frowned. "And you know I'd follow you anywhere ... But I can't, Steve, not this time. We can't be sure that I'm completely safe --”

“You’re free. You’re out. They can’t control you anymore.” 

“You don’t know that, Steve. You don’t.” Bucky ducked left, narrowly missing Steve’s right hook. “And until we know for sure, we can’t risk me back in the field. It’s too dangerous.” 

Bucky shook his head, taking another swing, his right hand connecting hard with Steve’s blocking arm. 

“You’ve done weeks of therapy and reconditioning.” Steve paused for a moment and lowered his arm, defenseless. “What are you waiting for? What are you scared of?”

"You think I'm safe? Really truly safe?" Bucky's eyes darkened in challenge. "Use your other hand."

Steve looked at him confused.

"Do it."

Steve pulled his left arm forward, stepping back into a simple blocking stance. Bucky was on him in an second. Blow after blow, each well coordinated and aimed at Steve -- even with one arm, the former assassin landed hit after hit on him breaking through his defenses.

Steve seemed surprised by the sudden aggression and blocked as best he could, but could still feel the occasional foot, knee, elbow and fist getting past him. This was gonna sting when they were done.

"You think I'm safe? That I'm cured?" Bucky shouted, finally landing Steve into a chokehold from behind. "I could kill you," he said quietly and Steve felt his blood run cold at Bucky’s tone. "I could leave you paralyzed. I've done it so many times, I know exactly where to apply pressure to the spine. You think I'm not dangerous after a month of therapy? You think they took the killer out of me?"

"You were never a killer Bucky," Steve said quietly, fighting for air. "You're a victim and you can't hide in their shadow forever."

Bucky loosened his grip a tiny bit. It was enough. Steve wrenched his arm off and flipped Bucky over, sending his hurling across the mat.

"I know you're ok, the doctors deprogrammed whatever shit Hydra put in your head. You aren't their weapon anymore."  The two began to spar again. Steve continued. "You aren't under their control. You've worked so hard to be free why would you want --". His words were cut off by a fist to his face.

"You're wrong," Bucky whispered.

"No, I'm not, and I'll prove it." Steve landed a solid hit, knocking him to the ground. He held Bucky down in place and met his eyes. "Longing. Rusted. Seventeen. "

Bucky's expression changed from annoyance to horror and disgust. "What the fuck are you doing?"

"Daybreak."

Bucky kicked Steve off of him and made a reach for his mouth. "Stop it!"

"Furnace." Steve backed away, keeping distance between them as Bucky advanced, trying to stop him.

"Steve, this isn't funny. Stop! You're crazy. Enough."

"Nine."

"ENOUGH!" Bucky slammed him into the wall, his hand around Steve's mouth. "Why, Steve? I thought ..." He stepped back, his face falling in sadness. "Why...?"

"You're not --"

Bucky turned and slammed his fist into the wall, just inches from Steve’s face. "Just. Stop." He pulled the boxing glove off his hand and let it fall to the ground. Shoulders shaking as he fought the urge to either cry or scream, he opened the door and left.

Steve leaned back against the wall, watching him go. He had only wanted to prove --. It was stupid. And it hadn't worked. And now he was left wondering if he had fucked up too much to fix. The look of betrayal and pain in Bucky's eyes haunted him as he slowly undid his own gloves.

* * * 

Bucky had wandered in the Wakandan gardens for a long while before coming back to their room. Their room. The one he shared with Steve. Steve, who had betrayed his trust ...

He stood by the window, lost in thought, gazing out at the jungle. He was still remembering Steve, was still piecing it all back together -- their time before the war, the relationship they both wanted but couldn't have. And then everything that he'd done to Steve as the Winter Soldier. He couldn't unsee it. Whenever he closed his eyes the faces of people he had killed, empires he had toppled, lives he had destroyed -- it all came back to him in a freakish nightmare loop.

Through it all, Steve had believed in him, had truly thought Bucky was worth saving. It should have been a blessing, waking up in a century where they didn't have to hide, where they were accepted together. Well, ok they still had to hide, but that had nothing to do with the fact they finally shared a bed.

Two super-soldiers from another century hiding out from a few world governments ... It wasn't cut out to be the smoothest relationship. But Steve had crossed a line tonight.

Bucky tried hard to slow his breathing and let go of the anger coursing through him. For so long those trigger words had been his nightmare, and now he would have the memory of Steve saying them. Of Steve trying to pull out the worst in him --

"I'm sorry."

Bucky jumped slightly. He'd been so lost in thought he hadn't heard Steve enter the room.

"Buck, I screwed up. I'm so sorry."

Bucky took another deep breath before turning to face him. Steve was still wearing the sweat soaked t-shirt and sweatpants they'd been sparring in. He'd closed the door to the room and was standing close to it -- possibly an escape route, or possibly trying to give Bucky space.

"I know you're angry at me and you have every right --"

"You're damn right I'm angry," Bucky cut him off. "Do you know what could have happened? Do you have any idea -"

"I trust you."

"Trust me? It's not _me_ you have to worry about. "Me" isn't the one who would have snapped you in two and thrown you across the room. "Me" isn't the one who would have wreaked havoc on --"

"I wouldn't have let that happen," Steve started to say. "I would've --"

"You would've what, _controlled me_?!" Bucky demanded, his hand clenching into a fist, his anger rising again. "Is that it, Steve? You want your go at ordering the Winter Soldier around? Think it's fun to be the puppet master?"

Bucky had closed the gap between them, planting himself in front of Steve, who frustratingly looked incredibly calm.

"No! How could you even think that? I was saying I would have stopped you, I would've knocked you out or tied you up or locked you --"

"That’s still control." Bucky said bitterly. "Besides, even if you could have stopped me physically it wouldn't have stopped ..." He stopped, taking a step back and turning away from Steve. He was trying so hard to hold it together, and the gentle hand that Steve placed on his shoulder wasn't helping.

"Wouldn't have stopped what?" Steve asked gently. Bucky didn't reply. A long moment of silence passed between them before Steve realized ..."The memories, they're stronger when you're triggered? The faces are clearer when you're the Soldier?"

Bucky nodded. Fucking Steve and his goddamn intuition.

"I didn't know," Steve said quietly. "Oh god, I'm so sorry, I didn't know." He stepped closer to Bucky's back, placing his arms around Bucky's waist and pulling them close together, his head on Bucky's shoulder, their cheeks lightly touching. "I'm sorry, Buck. I wanted so badly to show you I trust you, that you’re cured. But I screwed up. You're not the Soldier anymore. You're a good man, and I'm not giving up on you," Steve said quietly. "I just... I just wanted to show you that. Please forgive me."

Bucky reached his arm up and grasped Steve's hand with his. He could feel his breathing evening out and his anger melting away.

"If you ever pull something like that again, I'll kick your ass so hard."

Steve smiled into his shoulder. He pulled lightly on Bucky's waist to spin him around. "Never," he promised, placing a gentle kiss on his lips.

Bucky wrapped his arm around Steve's neck, running his hand through his hair. "I mean it, old man,” he said, kissing him again. 

Steve pulled back first. "I'm sorry," he said again, meeting Bucky's gaze.

Bucky smirked at him. "I know. Why don't you show me just how sorry?" He gently pushed Steve backwards towards their bed.


	2. Mission: Control

Four months after Bucky came out of cryofreeze, Steve was proven right. 

Weeks had turned into months and Steve had finally convinced him to leave the safety bubble of Wakanda. They had traveled around for a bit, both excellent at staying off the grid, until finally they realized they'd have to go regroup with the Avengers.

They were on a mission. And of course everything had gone sideways. Steve and Bucky found themselves in a cell even they couldn't break out of.

"Great plan, by the way," Bucky commented drily.

"Not one of my best," Steve admitted. "Any ideas on getting out?"

Bucky slammed his body against the cell door. It didn't even budge. He kicked it, pushed against it, tried prying it open. Nothing.

"Any other ideas?"

Bucky smirked at him. "We've both been in way worse jams than this. Besides, shouldn't your support team be showing up any second?"

"We're on our way," Natasha's voice said into his earpiece. "Little busy at the moment." In the background they could hear her kicking the ass of every single person who came her way, plus occasional gunfire and explosions. "Just sit tight and we'll be there shortly. Or, you know, figure out a way to get yourselves out of this mess."

Steve got up and placed a few solid kicks on the door. 

_"I wouldn't bother if I were you,"_ a voice said. They looked up, high above their heads was a speaker. _"This cell was built to contain two very special guests."_

"You ever notice how all the bad guys like to be disembodied voices?" Bucky said smiling.

Steve grinned. "Yeah, it does seem to happen a lot."

_"Yes yes, laugh while you can,"_ the voice continued. _"And don't think I don't know your people are storming my compound on their way to help you. Too bad by the time they get here they won't really want to rescue you."_

Steve rolled his eyes. "Alright we'll bite, what are you talking about?" He really was tired of disembodied evil voices.

_"Well, for one thing you won't be here anymore, Captain Rogers. And I very much doubt your friends will rescue the man who murdered you."_

Steve looked confused but when he saw the color drain from Bucky's face, he understood.

"Steve, did I hear that right?" Natasha's voice asked in his ear.

"Get here. Now." Bucky said darkly.

_"Longing."_   The voice said.

Bucky retreated to the back corner of the cell, crouching down in the corner.

_"Rusted."_

Steve crossed the cell, crouching down in front of him. "Hey, you're gonna be ok."

Bucky shook his head.

_"Seventeen."_

"You've beaten this Bucky, those words can't do anything to you."

"Knock me out, Steve," he said. "Knock me out while you can."

_"Daybreak."_

"I need you mobile when the team gets here, and you're going to be ok. You're not under their control anymore."

_"Furnace."_

"Steve, please." Bucky gripped his hands. "I don't want to hurt you."

"Barnes we're almost there," Natasha's voice chimed in. "Try to stay focused. Don't let them control you."

_"Nine. Benign."_

"Steve --"

"You won't hurt me," Steve said firmly. "You're stronger than this."

_"Homecoming. One."_

Bucky curled in on himself, trying to block the sound by covering his ears. Unfortunately his enhanced hearing made it pointless. This was it. This would be the end. The man in the control booth would order him to kill Steve and if he ever woke up from being the Soldier he will have lost the person he loved most. He had come so far, had finally started to believe he could be the good man Steve thought he was. And he was about to lose it all.

_"Freight car."_

Steve wrapped his arms around Bucky's shoulders. "I trust you, Buck. You're stronger than this.” He leaned forward to kiss Bucky and whispered, “I love you."

_"Soldier?"_

Bucky pushed Steve off of him and stood up.

"Almost there," Natasha shouted. "I can see the control room ahead."

Steve watched Bucky carefully, backing away slowly. His shoulders and body had gone rigid. His expression was blank. His eyes looked glazed and dangerous.

"Bucky -"

_"Soldier, are you ready?"_

"Ready to comply."

_"Kill Captain Rogers."_

Bucky lunged out, his face a mask of indifference, Steve ducked to the side.

"10 seconds," Natasha's voice came in.

"Bucky, don't do this," Steve said, his voice desperate.

Bucky sprang at Steve again, one of his fists landing a solid hit on Steve before the other man flipped him over his shoulder, landing him solidly on his back. Bucky swiped his right leg out, knocking Steve’s feet out from underneath him. Steve rolled away, trying to push himself back to his feet. But Bucky was too fast, and he had Steve in a chokehold again, the pressure on his windpipe constant but not enough to actually knock him out or kill him ... That was odd, why wasn’t the Soldier going for the kill?

Natasha's voice came over the main intercom. _"I got him, he’s down. Steve hold on and I’ll come --"_

The moment he heard Natasha's announcement that the threat was neutralized, Bucky released his grip on Steve. 

Steve coughed, pushing himself away from Bucky. Something was off....

“Steve? Barnes?” Nat’s voice was concerned in his earpiece. 

“Bucky?” Steve said tentatively. 

Bucky grinned up at him. “Sorry, I didn’t know how else to buy time. Hope I didn’t hurt you too much.”

Natasha rounded the corner into the cell, gun’s trained immediately on Bucky. 

Steve held out a hand to stop her. “Hey, hey no it’s fine.” He looked down at Bucky, who was still crouched on the floor. “It was all an act?” He offered his hand to Bucky and pulled him up. 

Bucky nodded. “I figured he had a backup plan to just kill us if he couldn’t control me. Seemed like the best way --”

Steve cut him off by smashing their lips together. 

Natasha smiled. “Nice. Pretty brilliant actually.”

Steve smiled, “That’s high praise coming from her. But really, that was...uh, convincing.” He rubbed the sore spot on his ribs where the Soldier’s foot had bruised him. “I guess this means --” 

Bucky grimaced. "Don't say it."

Steve leaned in for another kiss. "I told you so."

"I hate you," Bucky whispered against his lips.

"You guys want a minute or can we go back to ass kicking?" Natasha said drily.


End file.
